Blogging Struggles: Envy

Okay, so here’s a post I’ve kind of been thinking about writing again and again for a couple of weeks now and even more so the past few days. Do I want to talk about this? No, because I don’t like being vulnerable. But I also think it might be something that I should get off my chest and maybe someone out there is feeling similarly and this helps them in even the tiniest bit.

Y’all may have seen that the lovely May has taken over hosting the Blogger Awards this year and you’ve probably seen a lot of people nominate all of these awesome bloggers all over your feeds or Twitter timelines – I definitely have. And the more I saw these posts pop up, the more this envious feelings kept fighting its way to the top.

I said this on Twitter too, but it sucked not being included in most of the nomination posts – I don’t blame anyone, by the way.

We all have different tastes in blogs and I simply haven’t been active enough or involved enough to probably stand out for most/any of the categories to have people think of me and/or my blog as a possible choice for those categories.And I know this. But it still sucked and gave me that negative feeling about my blogging and myself as a blogger more often than I would care to admit.

The book community, as a whole, is made up of so many fantastic voices and advocates who have rightfully gotten shoutouts and appreciation for the past few weeks and I just want to make sure no one misunderstands me here, I am incredibly and truly happy for all of them. I see how hard a number of the nominated people work on their blogs and social media to stand out and be acknowledged.

And while this could be a great motivation to myself to do better and step up, I don’t feel like I have a unique enough angle to position myself within in the community which keeps bringing up the question if I should continue to invest time into my blog at all when it’s for ‘nothing’ (or, it feels like it’s for nothing at times), you know?

My blogging experience as a whole also hasn’t been the most fun anymore for quite a few months at this point. I don’t remember when exactly, but I started distancing myself from the community more and more. I stopped reading the blogs of people I adore and look up to, I stopped commenting on posts that I did happen to read and even more so, I stopped trying to find new blogs to get inspired by and to make connections with.

I feel like my entire blogging experience has mainly been focused on my own blog and the people who still take the time out of their days to leave me a comment – I don’t know if you know how much I appreciate it.

To be honest, I don’t know if I have the energy to even try and go back to the way I used to approach blogging probably about a year ago (or maybe a bit longer). And then I think maybe that’s exactly what I need to do: go back to the way I used to do it. Reach out and read different blogs. Discover new blogs and bloggers. Be inspired by the voices around me. Be more open. Because I do truly miss that, even if it doesn’t always sound like it.

And now I’m kind of struggling to wrap up this post because it’s mainly just been me putting my thoughts to the screen up until now and there’s nothing else coming out of me anymore. xD I should’ve thought this through more and maybe made some notes – but I also knew that if I kept pushing this up, I probably wouldn’t hit ‘Publish’ ever, so. We’ll deal with this kind of mess of a post – I hope you guys don’t mind too much.

Have you guys had similar experience in your blogging journey before? If so, how did you deal with it or what’s something that you may have implemented to make sure you don’t end up in this position? Please, share any and all tips you have in the comments down below – I would really and truly appreciate them. Thank you!

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26 thoughts on “Blogging Struggles: Envy

  1. I definitely relate to what you’re feeling. I love how positive the Book Blogger Awards have been and I’m truly happy that a lot of great bloggers have gotten shoutouts, but then again Awards always make me anxious as well. Not only because I’m planning to do a last minute post myself, but also because it’s a bit disheartening to not see yourself on the nominations at least once, even though you’re genuinely happy for everyone who was mentioned. This just leaves me with a lot of mixed feelings and I’m glad to see that you’ve managed to put them into words, that made me feel understood 💕

    I do hope that you’ll be able to rediscover some of the blogging love for yourself, just know that I’ll always be here to support you and your posts! ❤💖 *hug*

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I can relate to this a lot! I was nominated for best book blogger over a year ago and then my life went haywire and stats and everything dropped drastically. I miss it all and the community but it was also a lot of work. I hope I can get myself back into it! I love your blog btw and great post!💖

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  3. yes yes yes swetlana i feel you! sometimes it feels terrible when i put my heart and soul into a post about a topic or a book that means a lot to me, and get no response from my readers and fellow bloggers. i sometimes feel underappreciated, and i’ve actually avoided award nomination posts like the plague because of this. i believe that this is something a lot of us smaller bloggers are struggling with as well and if you ever need to talk i’m here for you 😀 sending hugs

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  4. I can definitely relate to what you’re feeling. It’s rough, the tendency to compare ourselves to others can really bring down your mental health & make you feel worthless, but what I’ve been attempting to do is blogging for myself only. Put out content that I’d be happy to read — the things I find are important to me. And in doing all that and focusing on myself I hope to learn to love the way I blog & in time stop putting myself worth on other people. I really enjoyed reading your post. It could have been ghost written by me lol I am happy for those who have been recognised for those awards — but right now I’ll say I see you & I love your blog. Keep going. You got this! 🌈✨

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so, so much for your insight and words of support Eliza! They are very appreciated and I love your way of going about blogging! I’ll have to try and do that more often and embrace my other loves and bring them into blogging – that might make this all even more fun and exciting! Again, thank you! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I can relate to the feelings when you see how well other blogs do and with the awards. I know I’m not a huge, popular blogger and I’m ok with that. But I think it’s natural for us to feel a little envious or let down if we’re not getting recognized. As for blogging, I feel like you really need to do it for you. If it’s no longer enjoyable, maybe take a break for a few months and see if you miss it or not. I think we all suffer from a bit of burnout at times. It’s so important to take care of you first. (((hugs))) BTW, I love your blog and think you do a great job!

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  6. this is so incredibly relatable and i’ve felt this countless times. especially because i just started in january, i felt a lot of insecurities about how i could possibly make a splash when there’s definitely this hierarchy amongst bloggers. i used to try to make up for it by posting and tweeting at people all the time in order to capture some attention. i still feel it nowadays, but i try to combat it by focusing on my strengths and why i started blogging in the first place. i realize i cant commit to schedules or timelines and i’m a very very slow reader and there’s nothing i can do about that. so i try to approach blogging differently and focus more on creating a the quality and creating a voice rather than relying on how often people see me around. it helps in the happiness aspect because there’s slightly less pressure and it feels more natural, and I just hope it gets picked up on by everyone else. regardless, thanks for putting in the effort to do what you do, and i look forward to reading more 💖

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    1. Starting out more recently and not having the support system or just people around you, can be quite scary that’s for sure! I found myself in a similar position early on too but having a friend do it with me helped and just reading and commenting on other blogs and building relationships that way – I don’t know what I’d do without the people I was lucky enough to meet early on and who have stuck with me ever since. I hope you find a way to make blogging work for you and for it to be fun! ❤

      And thank you, so much! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Oof I feel this. I think I did eventually get past it (mostly), but it can definitely be disheartening. Honestly I think taking a hiatus, and then just only posting when I actually felt motivated, made it a lot easier to deal with not getting a lot of interaction (which is always what’s bothered me the most)

    But yeah. it sucks.

    ❤️❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Ah, I relate to this a lot. I think all bloggers will struggle with jealousy & envy, because it’s what we all do as humans, and it’s hard not to feel that way when you see so many other people who seem like or are actually doing better than you. I think for me, the way I’ve dealt with that envy is by looking to the past and seeing how much I’ve come from there. And I also have tried extra hard to interact and talk with a lot of other bloggers and try to build connections, in order to get more happiness out of my blogging, since that interaction is what makes blogging so special to me!

    I’m so sorry that seeing the nominations for the awards made you feel negative about you and your blogging. I completely understand that you’re happy for those who were nominated, but you are so so valid for your other feelings as well. (And if you feel the need to your explain yourself to me or anything, please know that I’m not expecting that, I really truly understand! 💖)

    But yeah, blogging envy is so hard to deal with, because you don’t really know how to fix it or make it go away, and a lot of the time, it still mostly stays with you. But I hope you can find some contentment with your blogging, and know that you and your blog are amazing! 💕

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    1. Thank you so, so much for taking the time to comment on this May, it means a lot! And you have really valid advice too. I don’t know what I’d do without the people I’ve been able to meet thanks to blogging over the years. That connection is 100% what continues to make blogging special. ❤

      Please don't feel sorry! You did an amazing job organizing and holding these awards and have put so much work into it – it's incredible. I just wanted to make sure you saw because I didn't want it to come across like I was trying to do/say something behind your back. Thank you for being understanding! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Envy is such a relatable feeling, for everyone I think. There are so many fantastic bloggers and blogs out there, that I personally find it impossible not to compare myself to them. This bloggers reviews are so well structured, this one has such beautiful graphics…I think I just try to remind myself that there’s a fine line between admiration and envy.

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  10. This is the first time I stumble across your blog and can I just say that I completely understand this! 💯 I remember in my first months of blogging I had so much energy to write and interact and write some more but now I feel like I’ve been spiraling and not finding any time to interact or read posts. And it’s not even that I’m busy – I’ve just been procrastinating and wasting so much time because I was afraid blogging too much would be a waste of time if that makes sense?? Wow I’m rambling but girl I love your writing style and design and definitely want you to keep blogging!

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  11. I love that you wrote this. Thank you. I didn’t know I needed to read this. And I think that’s part of the point. You never know who you will impact with what you write. But I also think that sometimes you write just because you have to. At least, that’s what I’ve been doing for as long as I remember.
    I was a somewhat enthusiastic blogger when I first began in 2015. Somewhere along the way I lost interest, not only in writing new posts, but reading other blogs too. I think my personal expectations did not match the reality of blogging and I was disappointed. I totally felt envious of people who had something to write about on a regular basis and kept up with the community. Eventually, I don’t know if it was school, or work but I found that I lacked the motivation to even open up the emails notifying me that my favourite writers had posted new blogs. This lead to me deleting my blog late last year, having been neglected for over 2 years. Today I published again, under a slightly altered name. I don’t know if this stint will last, but I hope so. And you have a new follower, excited to read whatever you write next.

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