Hello & Where I’ve Been

Hello everyone – long, long time no see!

From what I can see on my end, there are still so, so many of you guys who follow my blog which I didn’t expect to be the case when I went off on my hiatus, especially since I didn’t know how long it would last for. And even more surprising is probably the fact that I still get people visiting my blog daily. It’s nice to see three years of working on this blog paying off like that. πŸ™‚

If you’ve been around here for a long time, you probably know that I was having more and more trouble when it came to posting regularly on here becasue I didn’t have the motivation or inspiration – especailly when I didn’t read as many books anymore. What does one talk about when they don’t read new books to talk about? And to be fair, my newest dicovery back during the summer of 2019 kept me quite distracted too: Kpop.

I still love kpop with my entire heart and don’t see that changing any time soon. And I’m also still not reading nearly as much as I did in 2019, let alone the years before that. But I’m also slowly realizing that this happens with my hobbies quite often. I fall in and out of love with them in waves. Same thing happened with my bullet journal and Instagram. I love putting too much pressure on those hobbies and suddenly they’re no longer as fun anymore. We’re working on that.

And speaking of working on things: I finally started therapy earlier this year.

I got diagnosed with depression in November of 2016 and tried it with just plant based and than other medications (all prescribed by my doctor) for the longest time and then finally took that next step this year when a friend gave me the push I needed. I’ve been going weekly since early March and it’s really been great having someone to talk to and work through things. I’ll also be going to rehab for my depression at some point in the new year, which I’m excited about. I’m finally taking the time to do what’s right for me. I always put everyone else before myself, but that’s going to change. I need to take care of myself to be able to be there for others.

Some other big things that happened this year was my dad getting and recovering from heart surgery just as Covid really picked up here in Germany and we went into our ifrst full on lockdown. I had started this programm late November 2019 but hadn’t been able to actually attend much then because my depression kicked in full force, but once I was well enough to attend again, myself and the two women working their attacked my financial situation and made some amazing progress there, which lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. The funny thing is, I didn’t even know how much it was weighing on me until after I left that first appointment and then started crying in my car.

My oldest nephew started school and I’m so, so grateful I was able to be there for his big day (everything was different with Covid this year, obviously) and to celebrate with family. My youngest sister told us she was pregnant and had a healthy baby boy this year too and I’m just absolutely smitten. He’s adorable and beautiful and just perfect. And yes, apparantly we only get nephews in my family. xD We’re up to four now. The same sister also got married this past weekend which was yet another weird situation with Covid, but we were able to get together with immediate family only to celebrate them and their little family. It really is special being there for these events in your siblings lives.

I really feel like despite the fact that 2020 was such a weird year overall with Covid taking over everything, I was still able to make the most of it for myself. I made some much needed progress and finally asked for help when I needed it. January 1st!Me would never believe where I am today, on December 20th 2020.

As for what’s next with the blog? I’ll be trying to figure that out these next few days leading up to the end of the year. I’ve been thinking about returning here more and more often lately which I think is a good sign. I don’t think this will be strictly a bookish blog from now on though. I want to bring more of myself into this space and share more of my other hobbies too.

But mostly, I want to take away the pressure of having to read books to be able to post something here. That just doesn’t work for me, as I’ve learned from other hobbies and in therapy. I want to stop putting pressure on myself when it comes to my hobbies.

I hope you guys will welcome me back into the community after being away for so long – I definitely want to get back to staying up to date with all of you too. I’ve missed reading your posts and seeing what you’re all up to!

For now, I think I’ve rambled on enough though. Thank you for reading this far and for not leaving my blog yet – I appreciate it so, so much. It means the world. See you guys soon. πŸ™‚

13 thoughts on “Hello & Where I’ve Been

  1. WELCOME BACK, SWETA!!! I know this year was tough on all of us, but I am so happy to hear you took measures into your own hands and thought out help where you felt you needed it. That’s such an amazing step!
    Don’t worry about the content of your blog too much πŸ˜€ mine is all over the place and people still show up. You’ll make this your corner of the internet and I hope that will lift some of the pressure as well.
    I wish you and your family a good last days in this dreadful year and hope we all get to start into a brighter 2021

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for the warm welcome back, Kat! It means a lot. ❀ Haha, thank you! It's just always such a getting used to thing whenever someone switches up their content out of the blue, but I'm sure it'll benefit me to do it this way, so it's the right decision. πŸ™‚

      I wish you and your family all the best too, Kat! Stay safe and stay healthy!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Welcome back, Swetlana! 2020 has been really weird and unexpected for all of us, I’m glad that you managed to have so many wonderful moments with your family ❀ I fell into k-pop this year, which has been a saving grace, because honestly this year is probably the worst in terms of negative thoughts circling for me. I'm really happy you decided to go for therapy, it sounds like a great step! ❀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Tasya! And 2020 really has been such a weird and not needed year in many ways – I’m glad you found something that made you happy in these times! Kpop really has done a lot for me too, especially with the people it brought into my life. I hope you’re doing okay and having a safe holiday season ahead! ❀

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Welcome back! I’m so glad to hear that your time off has been filled with so many wonderful events and milestones! I also think it’s great that you’re taking care of your mental health more and focusing on yourself. That’s something I’m trying to be better at myself.

    I’m so happy that you’re feeling like blogging again and I can’t wait to see what you have in store for the blog!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Welcome back! I’m happy to hear that you’re doing well & were able to start therapy despite the very weird year we’re having 😊

    I’d love to see different types of content on your blog to reflect your hobbies & interests – it’s always most important to post about what you’re passionate about! I hope you and your family are having relaxing holidays and a good new year πŸ™πŸŽ„

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Caro! ❀

      Yeah, I feel like maybe that bit was missing on my blog towards the end – I was limiting myself too much and it became less and less fun as time went on. I can't wait to see what 2021 has in store for us!

      Thank you, Caro! I hope you and your family are staying safe and healthy too. Have a great holiday season. ❀

      Liked by 1 person

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